“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” Ephesians 2:10
Have you ever read that verse and sort of rolled your eyes?? Okay, maybe you didn’t do the full out roll, but even just now maybe you read that verse and thought, “Okay cool, but I’m still not where I want to be.”
This post is all about our imperfections and our humanity, especially views of our physical appearance. It’s crazy how it’s all connected, though, isn’t it?
Read that verse again….
“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” Ephesians 2:10
Crazy question...What if we actually believed this? And I mean for more than just a flash of a second?
What if I actually internalized and accepted and lived life, believing I am Jesus’ treasure, His creation whom He loves? That He made me and every part of me on purpose?
It’s interesting to think about. A little off-putting for me. There are things about myself that frustrate me, that can get me down, especially on the topic of body image. But Jesus looks at me and calls me beautiful, cherished, His.
I think the desire to be beautiful isn’t simply a product of airbrushed models and social media; we are born with this hope and dream to be beautiful- to be chosen. Like Cinderella, I totally hoped that the moment I walked into any room, a perfectly handsome guy would see me and think, “There is the love of my life.” I got extra dolled up for school every morning starting in high school. I truly couldn’t bear the idea of leaving the house without foundation, eyeliner, and mascara. I totally agonized whenever I gained a single pound (which is laughable now, but also not too far from home sometimes!!).
I would definitely say a lot of my view of myself was defined by how I felt about my appearance. Feelings- the tricky things….they’re rarely reliable. And often straight up untrue.
Have you ever had these thoughts run through your mind when you look in the mirror?
“How could anyone be attracted to this?”
“What happened to me?! The good days are gone…”
“Where did that zit come from?!”
“This shirt will never fit the same….”
“Who am I now?”
Having two babies in 19 months is a wild ride. Just having one baby is wild, and it really is amazing what God created women’s bodies to do. It’s also a whole process of redefining beauty.
And that’s what I’m striving to do every time I look in the mirror and have a negative thought- redefine my thoughts of myself. But not just take them and make them something positive and empowering...I need something deeper. I need to know and tell myself what my Father and Creator says about me. That is where I find the definition of beauty.
So what does God say about me? JB and I just watched the movie “Overcomer” this week for the first time, and it was SO good. So powerful, and just a beautiful reminder that our identity is in Christ. In the movie, a mentor encourages her mentee to read the first two chapters in Ephesians and highlight every single thing that God says about her. It was SO beautiful! He says we are chosen, precious in His sight. Beautiful!
It just got me thinking….God created us and said we were “good”. We are made in His image. We are made to be a reflection of Him. Our beauty shines through in many more significant ways than "thigh gaps" (what a weird term haha. And yet, that’s something I’ve coveted ever since I learned about it) and flawless complexions or perfectly-toned arms.
We are given the great privilege of reflecting part of Jesus’ very being to others in our own imperfect ways. My hands aren’t made to look perfectly youthful forever so they can show off sparkly diamonds all over social media. They’re made to rub sick backs, to do dishes, make music, to braid curly toddler hair. My skin isn’t meant to be wrinkle-free until I die. I’m trying to embrace the laughing lines and creases and remind myself that I have lived such a full life.
It’s tough, this aging and postpartum business. I can 100% look at old pictures and go into this deep pit of despair over how different by body and face look. I can look in the mirror and think, “Why didn’t I take advantage of my youth when I had it?” First of all, what does that even mean?? I don't even know. Also, I know for a fact some of you are going to laugh or even scoff at that question. “Yeah Ruth, being 27 is SO hard.” And you know what? You’re right!! It’s totally something to laugh about. I’m not even thirty! I am so blessed to still have a young(ish), strong, healthy body. I can still do things and not be sore for days. I have yet to throw out my back or anything like that. I know and celebrate all of that. But I think we all tend to mourn the younger versions of ourselves the older we get; some people in their 70’s may long for their 40’s or 50’s again. I think we all miss being teenagers and being able to eat whatever we want. All I know is the data and experience I have from my life, and it sure is hard to compare yourself to early 20’s, pre-baby self.
An interesting thought popped in my head the other day:
What if we spent our entire lives without looking in a single mirror? What if all we saw of ourselves were glimpses through a beautiful lake, or the reflection through a fun, shiny ornament? Even sweeter to think about- what if we only saw the beauty that was reflected back to us from the love we shared with someone else?
You know what I mean?
Have you ever looked at someone and just felt beautiful? You could see it in their eyes- nothing but love and joy. A complete glow. It makes you smile just thinking about those moments, doesn’t it? Whether it’s the look of pride from a parent after you took a leap of faith, or that unforgettable moment frozen in time where you were staring at your spouse as you became husband and wife, those moments give us a glimpse of love and beauty.
We were given bodies to live in and take care of in this life. I’ve been given so many gifts! Eyes to see my kids and husband with, ears to hear the music I’m playing, feet to keep me up as I teach, knees to crawl around on the floor with my kids with, arms to help carry things for others with. Such gifts.
Our “gifts” are just that- things God freely gives to us. And we are to share them with others. But they’re all ultimately His.
So when I view myself and my body in that way, it starts to make a difference in what’s looking back in the mirror. I have to train my mind to not dwell on the hair that waves in different ways on both sides, or the now-sunken-in-belly-button. I have to train my mind to think of the gifts. To praise God for them. And to ask them to use them for others and for His good.
Now, this doesn’t mean I don’t take pride in my appearance. JB always navigates the utter minefield of my insecurities so well. He tells me I am beautiful all the time. He affirms and challenges me and always brings humor into those conversations, which he knows is a huge antidote for me. He often has me list five things I love about my appearance. And these days, I’ve tried to focus on the things that have stayed the same, even through babies and breastfeeding and age. My smile, my eye color, my complexion. Whatever it is for you, celebrate and praise God for those things!! You are beautiful!
But then it has to go deeper to last...at least for me. Because feelings and weight fluctuate. Comparison and envy crop up, and Satan can take hold. So my parting thought for you:
Do you know the verse about us being treasure in jars of clay? It’s 2 Corinthians 4:7. Here’s what a chunk of that passage says:
“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, with unveiled faces, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit. For what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, with ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness,’ has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.”
It’s beautiful to think that for those of us who know and follow Jesus, we are given His light and His reflection to share with the world. But we are so flawed and we mess up all the time. We don’t look, act, or think perfectly...ever. We are given the gift of showing a glimpse of His perfect love through our brokenness. We are just jars of clay...like Tupperware. We’re basic containers that serve a great purpose because of what is inside of us: the Holy Spirit. Think of this- containers are usually identified by what’s inside of them. Like, “Pass the sugar.” ...not, “Pass the glass container that contains the sugary goodness.” On our own, we are just shells, but with the Spirit, we are treasure-holders. With the Holy Spirit in us, we can do what we are created for- love God and love others. To tell others about this unending, undeniable love. A love that looks at us and says, “I made you. I love you.”
Another rambling post that I hope brings some joy and peace to your heart. What’s so beautiful is these truths don’t just apply to our bodies and our frustration over wrinkles and acne. This applies to all things we despise in ourselves. Do you have things that frustrate you about yourself? That even make you feel super down, or angry, or ashamed?
It’s okay. He knows all those things. And He still loves us. We are Tupperware. And we will not last forever in this form because we were made for more than sitting in the kitchen cupboard of earth. We will one day be reunited with our Savior whose own scars bear the love He has for us.
Will you believe that to be true? Will you believe in Him?
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