Lament

Thursday, May 14, 2026: 3:26PM

The school year is wrapping up, and I feel like I can breathe and be what I need to be a little easier. I can tackle the first trimester exhaustion and the symphony of emotions in the quiet, not just in the triage-style moments found in my car on the way to work.

As performances have ended and things are wrapping up, I have been able to slip back into more dedicated time of introspection and learning, and that has been so good for my soul.

Songs that have been a comfort to me right now:
“Overthinking” by Samantha Ebert
“Flowers” by Samantha Ebert
“Forty One” by Samantha Ebert
“Manasseh” by Anna Golden
“It is Well (Because He Lives)” by Tommee Profitt and Bay Turner

My book of the week:
Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament by Mark Vroegop.

This book, along with my mom’s book, Praying God’s Blessings in Christ as We Suffer, and the book of Psalms and Lamentations have been a balm to my weary soul.

They have all reminded me that it’s not only okay to lament, but it is necessary for the Christian walk.

What is lament? Mark Vroegop’s definitions have helped me pinpoint it:
“Lament is a prayer in pain that leads to trust… Lament is a path to praise as we are led through our brokenness and disappointment. The space between brokenness and God‘s mercy is where this song is sung. Think of lament as the transition between pain and promise. It is the path from heartbreak to Hope.” (page 28)

From page 26: “Therefore, lament is rooted in what we believe. It is a prayer loaded with theology. Christians affirm that the world is broken, God is powerful, and he will be faithful. Therefore, lament stands in the gap between pain and promise. To cry is human, but to lament is Christian.”

I have been reflecting on the four parts of lament, found in page 29 of his book:
Turn
Complain
Ask
Trust

“It takes faith to pray a lament. To pray in pain, even with its messy struggle and tough questions, is an act of faith where we open up our hearts to God. Prayerful lament is better than silence. However, I’ve found that many people are afraid of lament. They find it too honest, too open, or too risky. But there’s something far worse: silent despair. Giving God the silent treatment is the ultimate manifestation of unbelief. Despair lives under the hopeless resignation that God doesn’t care, he doesn’t hear, and nothing is ever going to change. People who believe this stop praying. They give up.” (Page 31)

While I have constantly felt at the end of myself these past few months, I have never ceased to pray and talk with God. Even when it has felt like He has been silent, I still long to talk to Him. Reading through the lament Psalms has reminded me that it is a beautiful and vital part of the walk to bring our questions, our thoughts, our pain, our disappointment and heartbreak to Him. He longs for us to.

James 4:8: "Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you..."

Psalm 73: 23-26: “Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

Matthew 11:28-29: “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Self-Doubt
I have been having an internal battle, feeling shame for my questioning and complaining to God. Satan loves to work when we are feeling weak and low:

“How can you be a faithful follower of Christ if you question Him? If you complain to Him?"
“Do you really believe He is good?”

Page 36 speaks to this:
“…laments are possible only if you believe that God is truly good. You see, the character of God—his sovereignty, goodness, and love—creates a tension when we face painful circumstances.

Lament is how we learn to live between the poles of a hard life and God’s goodness."

Anchors of Hope: Remembrance and Thanksgiving
I’ll be honest: I have gotten really good at the concept of complaint these past few months. It’s so freeing to lay out my concerns, anger, and sadness before God.
But complaints can’t be the final word. There must be a turning- a “yet”.

Psalm 22:1-5:
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
Why are you so far from saving me,
so far from my cries of anguish?

My God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer,
by night, but I find no rest.

Yet you are enthroned as the Holy One;
you are the one Israel praises. In you our ancestors put their trust;
they trusted and you delivered them.

To you they cried out and were saved;
in you they trusted and were not put to shame.

Psalm 73:21-26:
When my heart was grieved
and my spirit embittered,
I was senseless and ignorant;
I was a brute beast before you.

Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.

Even when my eyes can’t readily see the praiseworthy things in my life or my heart right now, I can reflect on His past faithfulness.

And what glorious wonder are we invited into as we behold the power of the cross.

Page 36 in the lament book talks about how the psalmist in Psalm 77 demonstrated his faith in God based on the exodus event- the Israelites fleeing from Egypt toward the Promised Land. That is often the major faith event the psalmists would reflect. But we have something much greater to draw our hope and faith from- a garden so full of God’s love and redemption. It was all demonstrated through suffering, loss, and death.

“For the Christian, the exodus event—the place where we find ultimate deliverance—is the cross of Christ. This is where all our questions—our heartaches and pain—should be taken. The cross shows us that God has already proven himself to be for us and not against us.”

To think that death- the Son of God’s death- brought life. To think that His suffering led to my redemption. His loss became my gain. All because He loves me, He loves Maggie, He loves you.

I am doing a Bible reading plan with a friend called, “When Worry Gets Loud” in the Bible app, and the devotional tied so beautifully to grateful remembrance:

“Notice the pattern: anxiety rises, so you pray. You don’t just “think positive.” You bring real requests to a real God, and you bring thanksgiving with them.”

“Why thanksgiving? Because gratitude is faith with a memory. It reminds your heart, ‘God has been faithful before. He will be faithful again.’”

“Today, take one anxious thought and turn it into a prayer. Be specific. Then add thanksgiving: name at least one way God has provided for or sustained you in the past. You are not ignoring the problem. You are refusing to let it become your god.”

“Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” -Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭6‬-‭7‬

Another part of the reading plan said this:
“Remembering is not nostalgia. It is spiritual warfare. It means calling your heart back to the evidence of God’s faithfulness. You rehearse what He has done, not what you fear He might not do. Asaph moves from staring at his feelings to staring at God’s track record..”

Psalm 91:
“Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday.
A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked. If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,” and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
You will tread on the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent. “Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.”